- oh my god the heat's back on. you know what that means.
- no pants!
- NO PANTS!
“ we don’t need your sass, jack hanna ”
jen (via gaylions)
we really are
“ CHEESECAKE! ”
“ i see a black rapper and just think kanye. because secretly i’m just hoping it’s him. ”
my roommate just came out of the bathroom said “don’t go in there” and grabbed a pair of rubber gloves
AT LEAST I WARNED YOU
NOT GOOD ENOUGH JEN NOW I’M AFRAID TO PEE
I FIXED THE FUCKING TOILET OKAY
JUST GO PEE
I’M ONLY LIKE 5 SIPS INTO MY CAN OF MONSTER DON’T TRY TO FORCE IT
“ it was supposed to be a peaceful experience and then it just turned into that monstrosity ”
we’re talking about helena bonham carter divorcing tim burton because of his next movie-pitch starring her as the lead female
we are funny-ass motherfuckers
“ See, it [Alice in Wonderland]’s, like, making fun of the fact that dodo’s are extinct — that’s like making fun of the Holocaust. ”
we’re both stoned and i’m still a little drunk and we’ve already said some glorious things but have also forgotten them
we are watching alice in wonderlonnnnn